Which side of me will win?

Now we know what can decapitate a twelve foot alligator

I honestly cannot remember the last time I felt this bored. I don’t mean the kind of seconds-crawling-by bored you get on a delayed train sitting motionless just outside of Basingstoke for two hours. I mean roundly, generally, broadly bored, in an overall kind of way.

For a long time I have had a strong buffer against boredom thanks to my job. I get tons of free videogames so it’s never difficult to keep myself occupied. I reckon if I just stopped getting them, the collection I have now could keep me busy for another five years at least. But this weekend it hasn’t even kept me busy for two days. Nothing seems to be holding my attention. I am just bored. Borrrrrrr-rrrrrrr-rrrrrrrrr… d.

Why? I think I have an idea why, but I’m not going to go into it because it relates to personal issues that have been affecting me for some time. But don’t worry, I’m pretty sure the boredom is a positive sign.

So, I’ve been thinking about maybe doing a regular blog for a little while now. A few of my friends do and I reckon that’s the sort of thing I ought to do. I enjoy writing. It’s the thing I like most about my job. Yes, even more so than the free games. Yes, even more so than the free trips to luxury hotels in far-flung places. Yes, even more so than the hookers, the drugs or the money.

But what to write about? Well, one idea I had was to do what most people do on blogs – i.e. witter on about the minutiae of my life – but take it to extremes. I wondered whether I could report on my day-to-day life in a tedious level of detail, yet still make it enjoyable for others to read. So I’m going to try it.

I have an odd mix of character traits. On the one hand I am long-winded, self-indulgent and analytical. On the other I am spontaneous, intuitive and funny. I have in mind that this blog become a battleground over which these two sides of me fight for dominance. I honestly wouldn’t like to bet on a winner.

The boring side had in mind to continue from this point straight into a blog about my day today, and this would have, eventually, explained where the title of this blog came from. But I’ve got my eye on Boring (yeah, I’m making them into proper nouns), and I’m not going to let him have it that easy. To be honest, I really want Funny to win. He’s kind of an underdog in this fight. He’s hard to pin down though. Like, I think it was Funny’s idea to leave the title as it is and think up a new title for the next blog. But it might have been Stupid’s. He’s not really supposed to be getting involved, but no doubt frequently will.


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